I went to see the nurse this morning for my annual check-up. She said I had to stop wanking. When I asked why, she said, "because I’m trying to examine you!"
And hey....... Just got back from the World Strawberry Picking Championships. Lost in the final to a girl with no legs. Jammy cunt.
A lesbian goes to a nutritionist because she had indigestion. The nutritionist says, "It’s simple dear, you are what you eat." So the lesbian turns to him and says, "are you calling me a cunt?"
And hey...... The sad life of a penis: I’ve only one eye, my hair’s a mess, my relatives are nuts, my neighbour’s an arsehole, my best friend’s a cunt, and my owner’s a wanker. 🤣🤣
And hey..... When you think about it....Masturbating is like eating a McDonald's. You really want it beforehand but afterwards you're left ashamed with lots of soggy paper and sticky hands! 😫😅😤🍔🍟🙄🤪🤣
How does it change many dyslexics to take a light-bulb? One. How many psychics does it take to change a lightbulb?